People are afraid to let go of relationships even when they suffer so much in them. They hold tight to the belief that the other person is wrong, and is hurting them and if they would just change everything would be better. I began to ask, why do you want to be in that relationship? There would be a moment of clarity, the possibility of a new life where they would love and honor themselves, be creative and empowered and have strong boundaries to not let others treat them poorly. The next session would be back to more of the same, how can I change them, what is going to happen to our relationship?
What I realized is that each person is looking for love, but looking outside of themselves.
When they are not getting it outside of themselves they then blame it on the person they are expecting to get it from.
The other person is a mirror.
If you are not loving and respecting yourself you will never be able to get it from anyone else. Each relationship is a mirror. At the end of these times now in 2012 we are being asked to shift the consciousness of the planet to a love vibration, but it has to start with ourselves!
We are the only person we can control or change.
When we let go of trying to control or change the other and accept them exactly as they are in love in compassion we free up untold amounts of energy to use on loving ourselves. Trying to change other people is a way to stay in distraction and out of our own transformational work, but I will say, we can do a lot of healing while we are doing that as the mirror will always show us what we are seeing in others. We will project onto the others the very thing that we need to shift in ourselves. When we see it and we shift, miracles happen. We are happier! It is scary to take responsibility and realize we are not a victim. It is scary to shift and transform knowing, even if only on an unconscious level that we may be putting too great of a vibrational distance between our relationship. As we ascend in vibration by following our hearts and our truth the space between us and others widens. We begin to lose connection and don’t feel in sync. I just went through this as I was upgraded. But it is the only way, any other way just causes sorrow. The others in your life will react, they will feel distance, they will be irritated or repelled by the new vibration or they will be inspired and rise with you or a combination of these. It is critical at this time to move through the fears of losing relationships because we need every individual to access their true self, express their heart and raise their vibrations for the good of the planet and for the good of all of us as individuals and for our relationships, its the only way.
Love is the only way.
Read this amazing article by my dear friend Julia Piatt, one of my great spiritual teachers that shifted me into to ultra high spiritual ascension gear in February 2011 during a super storm full moon sweat lodge on her blessed property.