“Today, try listening to the wisdom of children;…observing how your pets live so contentedly in the present moment; rediscovering the surprising healing power of spontaneity; focusing on the good in any situation you are now encountering; expecting the best out of every day…” Simple Abundance, A Daybook of Comfort and Joy by Sarah Ban Breathnanch, from August 2nd.
Last night my youngest daughter asked for her Dad to come into her room after we had put our girls to bed. I was wondering about this as most times she asks for her momma. I heard the muffled sounds of her anguished crying and my husband trying to comfort her. My older daughter had come to get him, so I knew she was feeling for her sister. It turns out it wasn’t something smallish like, I want mom’s old lap top, everyone has one but me. She told her Dad that she didn’t like her school, that she didn’t belong there, she didn’t fit in, and several of her friends that she had before joining this school, were different now and she didn’t feel the same connection. So now, both of my girls are asking to be home schooled, again. My oldest daughter began to mention it in January. They each have different reasons. Madison fits in, likes most of the kids, loves her main teacher and could do without some of the specialty teachers. When we opened up the discussion she said things like. “I know the school is meant to teach to the individual child and their needs, but how can they really do that with 26 kids in the class?” Or my favorite, “I would love to spend each day learning and discovering things that I am really interested in and explore them deeply.” Wow! My husband, of course, felt horrible that our youngest was in such obvious pain. He said he doesn’t know what to do. That he thinks maybe they just don’t want to do the work. I lay there thinking, oh my god, I am going to home school again! Right when I am about to start graduate school. I don’t know where all the positive thoughts about doing that came from as I have been in complete resistance to the idea. However, I started thinking about NOT having to drive 2 hours a day, moving to our own rhythm, being home and being out of a structure that is broken. Spending time learning wonderful things, together. Our beautiful school that I love is trying to exist within a structure that doesn’t work. What the new energies that are around us are asking for is to be in alignment, truth, love and joy. Can I, with a good conscience NOT LISTEN to my children, who many times have a deeper wisdom than myself? Do I discount their intuitions, feelings and possibly their health to keep them in a system that I know doesn’t work? Fast forward to this morning. I had cleaned my office last night and discovered a book of daily inspirational reading and read the days entry and quite enjoyed it. I laid it at my bedside and decided to read it each morning before getting out of bed. Part of it is quoted above. I read it and began to process. I sat down to do my humming meditation on my king chair and both of my dogs jumped up there with me. I allowed them to be there to enjoy the love they were sharing with me and with each other and continued my meditation until I was moved to write this.